Today :)

I don't think I can describe how absolutely amazing it is to run tech. I love it, I love it so much. I can't wait to be in charge next year.

Demons

"Writers... are particularly prone to madness. There exists a striking association between creativity and manic Depression. Why are more creative people prone to madness? They have more than average amounts of energies and abilities to see things in a fresh and original way-- then because they also have depression, I think they're more in touch with human suffering."

-Unknown.

We all have demons. The difference is that you can either choose to over come them, or you can let them devour you. For so long I've been letting mine devour me. But not any more. I can beat them. I swear to myself I will.

I Will Never Tell You

How in love with you I am. It wouldn't be fair to either of us. It would only hurt me, and make you feel bad. Why would I do that to you? I only want to make you happy.

Thinking.

I think the reason that people never come to me with they're problems is because I go to other people so often with my own problems, they either think that I'm too screwed up, or they think I have too much on my plate. I wish I could fix this but I don't know how.

I hope that one day I'm able to find someone who I can go to, who will come to me in return. Maybe one day I'll have someone who doesn't get tired of me, or actually has the time to give me, or can give as much as I can. I'm holding out until then.

This is Relevant.

If you only knew...

It Makes No Sense!

I worked on Aida for a total of 5 days, and yet I miss it so insanely, it's not even funny. In those five days, I grew so attached. Maybe because it was the first show I ran by myself, or because it was the last show I'd work with some of my friends, but the point is I miss it. So much. This might take a while to get over...

Maybe I'm Thinking Too Much.

You can't force feelings. I feel like everyone would be a lot happier if they didn't force they're feelings. Sometimes people get hurt. Situations don't end up the way you want them, but isn't it so much better to just confront the problem, fix it and go back to being happy? I feel like if people did that more often things would be easier.

And maybe sometimes the hurt is worth it.

Tom Felton... why are you so amazing?

Tom Felton - If I Could Be Anywhere

I would marry this boy....

I Needed This

Can I just say how much I love Christian Brannon. Somehow he always knows when I need him. This morning, he woke me up, "kidnapped" me and took me to his house to watch movies. Then we went over to the antique store and wandered through the narrow aisles, and laughed, and joked. After the less than stellar night I had last night, I desperately needed that.

I honestly don't know what I'd do without him. I've missed him so much. Maybe everything will work out after all?

If Bad Decisions Make Good Stories,

The past four years of my life could make it onto the New York Times Bestseller's List.

I Just Don't Know.

Everything's going really great right? I finally have friends who act like I matter. I have people who love and care about me. And yet I still feel so insecure. I'm waiting for them to change they're minds. Because everything I've ever experienced tell me that eventually they will change they're minds. I can already see it with some of them. I've slowly accepted the fact that I'm replaceable. I'm too broken, too damaged for anyone to keep me around as a permanent friend.

I guess I'm just going to enjoy it while I can.

"All I have to do

Is pretend I never knew him

On those very rare occasions

When he steals into my heart

Better to have lost him

When the ties were barely binding

Better the contempt

Of the familiar can not start

It's easy

It's easy"

-Easy As Life (Aida)

Hello...

My name is Mallory. I am 16, and sometimes I like to pretend that what I have to say is important to somebody. I enjoy copious amounts of sarcasm. I have an unhealthy obsession with books and I'm constantly searching for new ones. I hope to one day build my own personal library, like in Beauty and the Beast, where there's that entire room filled to the brim with books. I love photographs, but am really awful at taking them. Expect me to post a lot of photos. I have a tenancy to rant a lot about things that are important to me. If you're willing to put up with all this, to put up with me, then welcome. This is only the beginning.